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i glid

7/6/2012

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this afternoon cedric turned to me after tony dove into the pool and said... wait... what's the past tense of glide... glid i said... and it's stuck since...

i spent a week in the woods... with tony and his family. the fact that the only photographs i have are the few i will share here... speaks to how it made me feel. welcome and relaxed... and as if i had escaped all of life from beginning to end. i am very "connected" on a daily basis. my job and my art require me to be online almost constantly... i log on to facebook for work the moment i arrive... i have a daily reminder set to alert me to log on to a live chat help for clients with questions... i keep tabs on all of our clients... high profile and low profile all day every day... during this time my phone is always at the ready... next to my keyboard... and this is "normal" for me... 

my show last week was an overwhelming success... i was so happy to see everyone that came out... but it's been building... along with all of life... for months... we hit the road saturday... and once i left hayward and glanced at my phone... "no service" felt like a rainstorm after a drought... have you seen that commercial? the one where a jeep full of dudes rolls around from one secluded locale to the next... one man stands up at the highest spot on a nearby rock or up a tree... and says.... no.... and again... no... and finally... yes... "no signal" ... and that's where they set up camp?... whew. how is it that no signal... is our new escape? my brain finally had a rest... 
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i discovered a few things this week. 

1. it really means a lot to me when people take an interest in what i do... and ask questions about it. i think painting can be really lonely sometimes... i make it public often... but by public i mean via the internet... it's not often people sit by my side and watch me paint... this week they did... and they asked a lot of questions... where, how, why... etc... the opening last week did the same for me... it's been a long time since i did a show... it felt good to be surrounded by curiosity in my work... both at the cabin and at the show

2. i live life in fast forward most of the time. i have a lot of energy. i like that about myself. but... i feel like the last week was a gift in self discovery in many ways... the most obvious being that one of the greatest gifts anyone can give you is a "pause" ... or at the very least slow motion... a feeling that you don't have to decide anything. you don't have to act or describe or create anything... you don't have to do anything... but "be"... 

3. as mentioned above... most of my art "work" ends up crammed in between work, social activities, exercise, eating, sleeping and life in general... anything i have created in the last 2 or 3 years has been on little sleep... and in low light... after a day of work or before rushing off to somewhere else... this week... i painted for hours... with no end or beginning in mind... just sitting and working... and i found something out... when i paint without time constraints... i notice a lot more. lines and colors... it was truly calming to work on several pieces and let them dry... and come back to them over breakfast... next to the lake... 

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4. i also discovered that i am brave... i like driving small fishing boats without a steering wheel... jumping in the lake on a hot july afternoon just because i'm sweaty... elking with a spot light on a dark road can be scary and fun at the same time... i like tennis... i suck at big buck hunter... i am a lot less shy than most people... spiders don't scare me... ghost lake doesn't have any ghosts at all... (nice try ceddy) ... s'more bars are delicious and easy to make... age is easy to defy with energy... home can be found ... far from home... 
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5. a family with love in it... looks much like another family with love in it... that's not making it any less special or unique... but that love is universal... and forgiving... and fun
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6. this is something i already knew... but was reminded of... people are the most amazingly confusing gift in this life we have. getting to know people... having the chance to understand them... is the best puzzle on the planet! hooray for the time to do that. for the pauses and the shouts that are telling. i will never tire of the people i have met this week or in all the weeks before ... 
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