i spend a lot of my time feeling inspired and happy...maybe too much time... i like to think that i give back to the world as much as or more than i take away from it... the last few weeks it's been increasingly hard to feel like that. i am not one to complain much... and i certainly never want people viewing me as the debbie downer of the group... far from it... but i keep thinking about how this is the season of giving... and how most years i am so happy to give... i love making handmade presents for my friends and family... i spend hours each year sewing, painting and baking... i make a seasonal mixed cd every year... these things bring me joy... i take great care in wrapping packages with love.... but this year... i feel like i have very little to give... i have been in a self preserving mode for the last few months... and it's become more so the last month... maybe my cup that normally runneth over is just a little bit on the low side... or maybe it's the weather... i am running on empty for seasonal joy today... and i am waiting for the glimmer i normally have in my eye... the wander on back i haven't had much time for painting these days... i've been spending much of my time trying to make money... i have been missing a feeling so much lately... it's leaving a hole in my heart |
the past
October 2015
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