The Northeast CDC, which "works to promote the economic development of Northeast Minneapolis in a manner that furthers the interests of both residents and businesses." Puts out a Calendar every year.... The "Northeast Calendar was created to celebrate the Northeast neighborhoods and the artists, artwork, and creative communities therein."

This year I am lucky enough to have two of my paintings in the Calendar. I don't have all the information about where and when they will be available yet... but I will update you when I know more.

For more information on The Northeast CDC you can check them out here: http://www.northeastcdc.org/?page_id=110

do you ever think about your own funeral? not to sound morbid... but I've seen a lot of living and dying recently. while gazing through these windows... I can't help but throw myself into the casket. I read a book not too long ago... the 7 habits of highly effective people... one chapter asks you to sit down at a funeral... greeting the mourners... noticing the looks on their faces... as you walk up to the casket you realize it is you they are saying goodbye to. the "exercise" tells you to pick people from different parts of your life... if memory serves me correctly... they are to be a family member, a close friend, ,a lover/spouse and a member of your community. ... you are to sit there, at your own service and imagine what each of them would say about you. what have you done in your life. what did they take away from knowing you. it's strange to me now that I've been to a few funerals this year. literally two for family members... and figuratively a couple of people leaving my life in other ways. I can't help but reference this chapter when I think of those people... and then of myself.

last night I had a horrible nightmare that someone was trying to kill me. it was so vivid it took me a long while to recover. these things have all been in the back of my mind today at work... despite the fact that today was one of the busiest on record. it's hard to mute your brain... sometimes even more so when things are chaotic.

anyway. you are a captive audience... at least until you click the back button... so here goes.

WHEN:

I die in the spring: plant me somewhere without a coffin... beneath a weeping willow tree... beside a pond... like they are at my parents house

I die in the summer: I want my ashes to be in a Styrofoam cup.. maybe from the little oak gas station in my home town... roll down all the windows... open the sun roof... and while a romantic song is playing at full volume on the stereo... toss me along the highway.... going too fast... and laughing about something I did that was stupid

I die in the fall: find a grove of sumac turned to crimson... pull out all the roots of one and hide me under it... while drinking a hot cup of coffeee

I die in the winter: find a little pond.... and a pair of ice skates.... get a bunch of D batteries and play the Tchaikovsky nutcracker tape on a rickety old boombox... my sister and I used to skate to in the back yard... pretending we were figure skaters... throw my ashes up... while it's snowing... so I can be lost in the snow...

there is one other stipulation in my recently elaborate funeral plan. at the end of the day.... when everyone just feels depressed... I want a magical jar of quarters... a terrible dive bar and a juke box that is so good you can't believe you own eyes. I want everyone to play me a song. until the quarters run out... which is possible because this is my funeral fantasy. I want my friends and family to be drunk on my memory and booze... because I would be if I was there.

I know my parents are reading this and having an anxiety attack. don't worry... I have no desire to off myself... and as far as I know right now... I will be around for a while... I've just had mortality on my mind.

I do have positive news... a couple of my paintings have been selected to appear in a Northeast Neighborhoods Calendar coming out sometime in the coming month or so... I will impart more on that when I have the information...  if I have photos of the submissions somewhere but not on my laptop so those will have to wait for tomorrow .

one last thing... if you pick up a quarter on the table... at my funeral after party... this is the song you should choose....

I know the picture above just looks like a big wonky mess of art supplies... and I suppose... to you that's what it is. 

About 5 years ago. I had a giant art studio. Actually... it was my living room. There was no living room. Actually... that house never had a couch or a TV in it. There was no lounging. Life was always either working... painting... or being elsewhere. For a myriad of reasons... I haven't had a proper place to paint ever since. I have made due with many various set ups. When I was living in my uptown studio (that means there's no bedroom)... i painted on the radiator in the ________room. I called it that... because it was everything... it was nearly the kitchen... sort of a living room and sometimes housed my bed... when my bed wasn't shoved in the only other corner... in the "kitchen". there wasn't a lot of space to spread out. but i did anyway. i liked the fact that i lived alone and no one ever told me to pick up. part of the creative process (for me anyway)... requires me to let things stew a bit. i did paint quite a bit there... but it was slightly discouraging always tripping over myself and trying not to get the radiator full of paint or the hard wood floors covered in glue. both happened anyway. 

after that... i had a little more space to paint... but it was in a cold dark basement corner... and yes, i could leave things laying around... but going down there wasn't much fun. I tried to ignore that it was cold... and dark and kinda gloomy. not much art came out of that room... minus a brief stint of creative nirvana last spring. 

anyway... i have been sad for the entire 5 years... because i keep remembering how awesome that living room studio was. i had everything strewn about. my records. huge speakers. a giant window. and a back yard just through the giant sliding glass door at the back. there was a glorious year or maybe two... when i painted EVERY DAY. most days for 4-6 hours at night. it became an extremely healthy addiction that left me feeling so alive... every single day. I have really been missing that. bad. 

well, as luck would have it... a whole bunch of space has opened up here at my day job. about 10 steps from my office. The lease here is through May... and I intend to make use of all of this new found freedom to create at full volume.... instead of in tiny bursts of organize freedom... as has been the norm for so painfully long.

In other art news... I am participating in 2 group shows in December... one at Palmers (where I will be showing my never before seen collages that came out of that burst of spring i was talking about earlier this year)... and at Covet ... those will be all new minneapolis sign paintings priced to sell for the holidays :) more information coming on those soon. There are openings for both I believe. I have more exciting art news... but I will save that so I have something to talk about tomorrow... or the next day. 

also... finding so many things that bring back a memory or two from boxes of art supplies and ripped papers... saved photos... letters... things like that... i found this among those... 

Found at an estate sale... somewhere between green bean casserole a recipe for chocolate cake. i stole it. now i sort of wish i had left it there... in the box... for someone else to stumble on.

*** disclaimer... bob Dylan has nothing to do with this post... except that tromso is a beautiful winter place... and I love bob Dylan... continue reading***

Time flies... but you are the pilot....

Aint that the truth.

It's strange to me... that everyone I love has set off for something new this season. I tend to be the one my friends and family see as the rogue... the wanderer... the warrior... but you guys all have me beat. New jobs... new lives... new families... death... marriage... a change of space.. a baby... a divorce.... New relationships... personal improvements... everyone I care about has taken on a new life or a new challenge this fall. It's humbling... and inspiring.  

These photos are all from my recent trip to Tromso Norway... somewhere I never thought I would find myself... and where I seemed to feel right at home. I haven't seen my parents since I've been back and so these photos are for them... they've been hoping to catch up with me... but life is busy...

I talked to my mom yesterday.... and she said something that meant a lot to me...after I gave her a bit of advice...  she said... "jen... I knew that was exactly what you'd say to me... I just wanted to hear you say it"...

sometimes we forget how much weight our words carry.

how much someone just wants to hear from us... or how others see us as a beacon of hope. I feel those I consider to be my nearest and dearest... have been so brave this year. they've taught me so much... and I am so excited to see what the next year holds for them. someone said to me recently....

"change is always good, most of the time' ...

so many changes this year. as my dad would say... it beats the alternative.

tromso is beautiful. if you ever have the chance to steal away there... I would highly recommend it. I have a love affair with ships and mountains... this city (village) has them both in spades... the sun is elusive... the people are quiet... the whole place has an undercurrent of unspoken wisdom. I feel right at home in Scandinavia... it's strangely true that we are so much of what came before us. I like that everyone in Norway is friendly but only when spoken to. I like that no one bothers you... it's a quiet place... with a loving energy. Anyway... I am so glad I had a chance to try to understand that place. I feel like understanding is something I work very hard at.

if you cornered me... and asked when this love affair started... I wouldn't have a good answer...

for as long as I can remember... the things I don't know... trump the things I do...

before I really begin...I would like to apologize to my dad personally for not including all of the beautiful sunsets... and scenery photos that have been a part of this last year... instead... I am going to show off the weird and personal things I have seen...

I have been feeling a little guilty lately. I haven't given my art the attention it deserves... but tonight I realized something... I have been around the world this year...

I could feel bad about not painting more... but that seems silly now. I have seen so much... been to so many places... and travel only makes me more antsy... I spent most of the week trying to figure out how to spend a month in Barcelona this spring to paint and explore....

I have been all over this country... and I just returned home from Norway... but I have an insatiable appetite for travel... unpacking my suitcase only makes me want to pack it back up again....

I realized recently that this has been my most traveled year to date... I have been to Chicago (twice), new York, Puerto rico, the virgin islands, Norway, bayfield, Duluth, Arizona, las vegas, gunflint lake (i saw a moose), Detroit, Milwaukee, Madison, Denver, new Orleans ... Mandan!  by rail... and probably others I have forgotten...

the thing is I worry I am getting jaded. this seems like business as usual... all I can think about is plotting my next adventure... someone posted this online today... you're supposed to fill out the states you've been to.... green means you've been to them a lot... here is my map...

I looked at this map and felt disappointed.... look at all of the places I don't know that well... look at all the holes... Oregon!? the Carolinas!? I feel like it's time to pack everything up and start exploring again...

I wish everyone could just get in the car and go... to see the mountains... and the prairies.. and the giant cities that this vast country has to offer... I swear that a road trip will cure everything on your mind. it gives you a perspective that is worth more than thousands in college tuition... see your nation. please.

the thing I like most about these photographs.... is that you have no idea where they are from.... because they are from everywhere.... and nowhere...